The Hirshon Royal Haggis for Burns Night

Citizens – for those of you who are not of Scottish blood, be advised that tonight is that most sacred Scottish holiday: Burns Night!

Celebrating that most famous son of Scotland, the poet Robert Burns, all good Scots tonight partake of the pomp, circumstance and rituals surrounding the holiday: bagpipes, toasts, oration and of course the eating of Haggis, aka “the Great Chieftain o’ the Pudd’n race”.

This most infamous of Scots recipes usually sends Sassenachs (non-Scots) screaming back to the English border and beyond. Yes, it uses parts of the sheep like finely minced cooked liver and heart cooked in a stomach. It also includes oatmeal, whisky, herbs and spices.

If you have a problem with this…

…get over it. 🙂

Your average hot dog has all those organ meats in it plus snouts, ears and assholes – haggis is a cleaner and nobler sausage by far! You don’t eat the stomach, by the way…

As to the history of haggis, allow Me to quote from historytoday.com:

Haggis’ origins are shrouded in mystery. There is no telling where – or when – it came into being. Some believe that it was brought over by the Romans. Although evidence is scarce, their version – made from pork – probably began as a rudimentary means of preserving meat during hunts. Whenever an animal was killed, the offal had to be eaten straight away, or preserved.

This wasn’t an easy thing to do in the middle of a field or forest, so the offal was simply chopped up, packed in salt, stuffed into the animal’s stomach or wrapped in caul fat and then boiled, sometimes in a rudimentary basin made from the hide. It wasn’t pretty, but it lasted for a couple of weeks – and ensured that nothing went to waste.

Others think that a similar type of proto-haggis may have been imported from Scandinavia by the Vikings at some point between the eighth and 13th centuries. In support of this, the Victorian philologist, Walter Skeat, suggested that the root, hag, may have been derived from the Old Norse haggw or the Old Icelandic hoggva – both of which mean ‘to chop’. As such, the name would have meant something like ‘chopped up stuff’ and referred to the method of preparing the offal before it was stuffed into the stomach or caul.

Others still claim it as a French innovation. As Walter Scott pointed out, hag is also surprisingly similar to the French verb hacher, which – like haggw/hoggva – means ‘to chop’ or ‘to mince’. Given the historically strong relationship between France and Scotland (the so-called ‘Auld Alliance’), it is possible that some sort of precursor – not dissimilar to the modern crépinette – might have been brought over at some point after c.1295.

This recipe is delicious. Try it. Just once. Or not – but you’ll be missing out. For the bravest amongst you, who will try the recipe – I salute you!!! My recipe is without question the finest that can be tasted and is totally authentic with one exception: lungs cannot be sold legally in the U.S. so I’ve instead substituted minced lamb’s tongue.

To make my recipe “royal”, I have added in some wild venison meat, which was reserved for nobility and royalty in Scotland for hundreds of years! You can purchase actual wild venison meat from this fine purveyor, or just use venison meat sourced from a local hunter or provider. If you prefer a “common” haggis, just omit the venison and replace with beef liver. I – of course – prefer the Royal version! Using the finest Scotch whisky in the recipe is also My hallmark!

Serve this recipe with the classic “neeps and tatties” (mashed rutabaga mixed with mashed potatoes) – I personally prefer this classic recipe from the Orkney Islands!

Battle on and Happy Burns Night – The Generalissimo

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